My Thoughts, Feelings & Experiences

“I am leaving,” she said.

Alex’s thoughts were interrupted as he glanced sideways towards the doorway. There she was standing with all the beauty and grace in the world. He was staring at the prettiest face he had ever seen. His heart skipped a beat and his mind seemed to stop functioning. This was the moment he had always dreaded…the moment of parting. He wanted to say so many things but the words wouldn’t simply come out. He seemed paralyzed. He seemed frozen.

“Actually I am not well,” she said.

“Oh that is bad.” He managed to say.

“See you in the city” she said with a smile.

“But I seldom see you.”

“I am usually at home” she replied.

 Alex nodded and smiled and then she disappeared from view. A stabbing pain shot through him when he realized that this was perhaps the last time. It was just a matter of coincidence. …. The time he had spent with her.

 From the balcony he saw the vehicle pulling away and disappearing from view. He was suffocating every instant. He could not breathe properly. He felt a lump in his throat. He closed his eyes and tried to remember.

 It was the other day at the shore. The sun had almost set and the dusk had engulfed everything around. The sky still held the last layers of the chrome glow. He looked ahead at the sea. She was sitting next to him and seemed lost in thoughts. Alex never felt like this before. With her enriching presence beside him, his heart was already stepping out into the sea. He felt like being in the deep and calm waters. The waves rose high with the rumbling of the sea and broke against the shore. And then the water retreated unwillingly into those depths once again. “Why wasn’t it always this way?” he thought.

 It was a different dimension. He had felt it when he had seen her for the first time. There was something different about her. Her eyes held the depth of the sea. Her face had a strange kind of glow and her voice almost melted and recast you into a different form. One could die a thousand deaths to be with her.

 Sitting there Alex had lost count of time. He had merged into the infinite. Nothing else mattered. Everything had stopped. It seemed as if only the two of them and nature existed and everything else seemed virtual.

 There are times when the heart speaks the silent language because the best of words fail to convey the deepest feeling within. Ripples of feelings went through him. All of a sudden life had a new meaning… there was something worth living for…. perhaps for the first time he felt complete and realized why all these years he had always felt so incomplete. She was singing and the wind carried the voice far across the sea to distant lands and uncharted islands. It was ecstasy It was beauty in its purest form and it was more colorful than the rainbow. Alex felt like being reborn. He wanted to surrender his complete self forever…

 The doorbell rang bringing his though stream to a grinding halt. He opened the door and looked at his friend. He knew it was time to leave.

 “Was it just another dream?” he thought when he saw the sea disappearing behind him.

Alex felt the sea water rise in his eyes.

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